Showing posts with label self-help. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self-help. Show all posts

A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted Review

A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted
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A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted ReviewEdit of 28 May 08 to correct typo pointed out by a reader, and to add links.
My wife asked me to buy this book after hearing about it. I did, it is a worthy useful book, and I will take its challenge.
The author does a tremendous job of gently pointing out all the things about complaining that are both negative and futile:
+ complaining is about what you cannot have or get--get over it
+ avoid chronic complainers, the disease spreads
+ Takes 4-8 months to move from unconsciously incompetent to unconsciously competent.
+ Complaining traps you in a constante state of "something is wrong."
+ Complaining is a form of manipulation
+ Instead of complaining seek alternative language or BE SILENT
+ Silence is mature self-possession
+ Commit to what you want and go after it--WITHOUT COMPLAINT when stymied
The book is quite effective at an underlying theme, God will provide. In acceptance lies happenstance, coincidence (or not), and harmony. The church that started this movement has given out 125,000 free purple bracelets, and issues Certificates of Happiness when anyone can attest to going 21 days without a complaint. They are starting up spin-off programs such as a Complaint-Free Relationship, School, or Workplace.
The author touches briefly on the strategic game of nations, pointing out that instead of negotiating the negative (like nuclear proliferation) why not spend more time sharing information and strategizing the positive, like the end of poverty and disease? Amen.
The book concludes with a raft of first person accounts, roughly one per page, and they are all serious and meaningful, not at all trite of hokey. This is a serious book for serious people.
Entirely and absolutely by coincidence (or not--I really am starting to come back to God "in community"), reading this book coincided with my reading of one squishy and one leadership book, and all three of them center on the same point: be open, be accepting, visualize the good.
I am so taken with this book that I am adding it to my CEO List (Collective and Commercial Intelligence). I find it hard to imagine a CEO of a Fortune 500 company that could get through a day without complaining, but boy, would I like to be around someone like that, who can drive a Fortune 500 company without ever complaining. Now *that* is leadership.
The other two books:
The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success: A Pocketbook Guide to Fulfilling Your Dreams (One Hour of Wisdom)
The Source of Leadership: Eight Drivers of the High-impact Leader
The more I think about, the more I am impressed by this book out of Kansas City, Missouri. This book is the essence of what is good and great about America as a frontier Nation, enduring challenges, never mind the occasional genocide, slave trade, and unprovoked war. The heart of this country is still good, even if the corrupt politicians have lost their soul. We can change all that in this next election, and I am going to stop complaining and start working to elect someone who represents the young, the good, and the future.
Bless all those who brought us this treasure, this gift of calm.
Other great books along these lines:
The Complete Conversations with God (Boxed Set)
The Tao of Democracy: Using Co-Intelligence to Create a World That Works for All
Left Hand of God, The: Healing America's Political and Spiritual Crisis
All Rise: Somebodies, Nobodies, and the Politics of Dignity (BK Currents)
The Faiths of the Founding Fathers
Society's Breakthrough!: Releasing Essential Wisdom and Virtue in All the People
The Wealth of Networks: How Social Production Transforms Markets and Freedom
Collective Intelligence: Creating a Prosperous World at PeaceA Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted Overview

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Using Your Brain--For a Change: Neuro-Linguistic Programming Review

Using Your Brain--For a Change: Neuro-Linguistic Programming
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Using Your Brain--For a Change: Neuro-Linguistic Programming Review
Starting with the deliberately ambiguous title, what you get in this book is pure Bandler. Not surprising, really, since the text is an edited version of several seminars Bandler conducted in 1982.

It seems to me that you can treat the book as an educational exercise, or as an interactive experience. Indeed, the editing is so effective that I could imagine myself strolling through town letting Bandler show me the world through his eyes, listen to it with his ears, and so on. And a mightily enjoyable experience it was.

At the surface level the book covers topics such as submodalities, learning, the "swish" pattern, etc. - keeping in mind how much of our experience is objective, and how much is subjective. Better yet, having pointed out that the majority of our experience subjective - it goes on to explain how we can radically change our lives for the better by "reprogramming" the bits we don't like.

Personally I found this to be an excellent book on the subject, with plenty of amusing and relevant cartoons by Gustav Russ Youngreen, and practical exercises and demonstrations throughout.

With regard to the difficulties mentioned by other reviewers, I would say that there are plenty of guys doing what Abby describes who wouldn't know NLP from a hole in the ground.
It is also worth pointing out that NLP is, after all, just another tool. And like any other tool, *some* people are bound to misuse it.

As for whether you can become proficient in NLP just by attending one or two trainings and reading some books, I agree - you can't.
And if you tell yourself that you don't understand, then you won't (that, too, is "reprogramming"!)

Like any other subject, you will only "learn" NLP when you "do" it. So anyone who thinks that reading this book, or any other, will make them into a master communicator overnight would probably be better off saving their money.

For readers who take the book in the spirit in which it was written, on the other hand, I'd guess you may find this a very enjoyable and beneficial addition to your bookshelf.Using Your Brain--For a Change: Neuro-Linguistic Programming Overview

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Neuro-Linguistic Programming: Volume I (The Study of the Structure of Subjective Experience) Review

Neuro-Linguistic Programming: Volume I (The Study of the Structure of Subjective Experience)
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Neuro-Linguistic Programming: Volume I (The Study of the Structure of Subjective Experience) ReviewEver wonder how people do things with their personal strategies? Robert Dilts crafts a great book about the different strategies and meta-strategies in learning and beyond. The beginning neuro linguistic programmer will learn about the different representational systems: auditory, visual, kinesthetic, gustatory and olfactory. How do people run their motivational or inspirational strategies for example ? One may imagine learning something quite useful for figuring out the lock in someone's personality. Elegant book for trainers who have to convince or train people with new material. Learn about how to discover people's strategies with this book. It's very logical and very scientific. Not a book for intuitive types! This is pure research and useful strategy about strategies in the world of neuro linguistic programming. Ever wonder how successful people become successful people? Here's the toolbox!Neuro-Linguistic Programming: Volume I (The Study of the Structure of Subjective Experience) OverviewThere comes a time when it is both useful, and appropriate, for the purpose of continuing to expand our understanding of the universe we live in, for entirely new fields of study to be created. Separating new from old, exceptions from rules, and useful from previously unquestionable. So learning and experiences from entirely divergent fields have the opportunity to combine knowledge and experience into configurations that allow further growth, understanding, and impact upon ourselves as a species. It is in this way that neuro-linguistic programming came into being. We wish at this point to separate our NLP from the many fields from which it draws information, from the many fields for which it has application. And in this way have greater clarity and freedom to delineate NLP's own methodologies and basic purpose.

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The Secret of Creating Your Future Review

The Secret of Creating Your Future
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The Secret of Creating Your Future ReviewThis sets out the Time Line TherapyTM model and how to use it on yourself to clear negative emotions and create the life you want. Written in the form of a little parable, this is an excellent introduction to this highly effective intervention. As the title suggests, the book focuses more on creating the future than on clearing up the past; nevertheless, it works both as a guide for the therapist and as a self-help book for the general reader.The Secret of Creating Your Future Overview

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NLP for Teachers: How to Be a Highly Effective Teacher Review

NLP for Teachers: How to Be a Highly Effective Teacher
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NLP for Teachers: How to Be a Highly Effective Teacher ReviewNLP for Teachers is for everyone. As an NLPer myself, this book simplifies explanations. Some knowledge of NLP is needed. I find it to be a wonderful learning tool to better understand yourself and others. Use it at home, use it in your work place. Learn how to "Use your Brain for a Change" Our minds are precious gifts, this will help you open yours.
JP Atlanta, Ga.NLP for Teachers: How to Be a Highly Effective Teacher OverviewNLP for Teachers covers a wide range of practical tools that will enhance your interpersonal effectiveness and classroom delivery. It explains how language and your internal processing affects the behavior of others around you.Reading this book you will learn some amazing tools and techniques and how to communicate in ways you never thought possible both inside and outside the classroom. Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is an established set of principles for teaching, learning and personal development. This book explores the core principles of NLP and how these can be applied to both your professional and personal life. NLP is "the study of excellence" and provides you with a variety of strategies for maximizing both your teaching and learning potential.

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NLP Coaching: An Evidence-Based Approach for Coaches, Leaders and Individuals Review

NLP Coaching: An Evidence-Based Approach for Coaches, Leaders and Individuals
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NLP Coaching: An Evidence-Based Approach for Coaches, Leaders and Individuals ReviewThis book provides an excellent context for understanding NLP from a coaching perspective. A 'must read' for coaches, HR professionals, organisations who use coaching as a people development tool, and any individual who wants to understand coaching from an evidence based perspective.
The book evaluates NLP from an enquirer perspective, addressing three fundamental areas: what is NLP based coaching and how does it relate to wider industry standards for coaching; evidence based NLP and best practice and how it relates to other applied psychologies; the researcher practitioner and recent developments.
Susie's writing is enjoyable and is balanced between providing the evidence base with practical examples and a thorough knowledge of NLP and Coaching.NLP Coaching: An Evidence-Based Approach for Coaches, Leaders and Individuals OverviewNeuro-linguistic programming (NLP) has become a common approach in the coaching industry, but many are still skeptical about it being a substantive and coherent methodology. This book is the first to look at NLP coaching as an evidence-based discipline. Susie Linder-Pelz describes how NLP coaching works, using examples and case studies to highlight what distinguishes it from other coaching approaches. She briefs readers on the theoretical underpinnings of NLP, and she explains which aspects of NLP can be backed with evidence and which aspects are not yet substantiated. A set of research questions helps coaches understand when and how to use NLP.

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Arrest-Proof Yourself: An Ex-Cop Reveals How Easy It Is for Anyone to Get Arrested, How Even a Single Arrest Could Ruin Your Life, and What to Do If the Police Get in Your Face Review

Arrest-Proof Yourself: An Ex-Cop Reveals How Easy It Is for Anyone to Get Arrested, How Even a Single Arrest Could Ruin Your Life, and What to Do If the Police Get in Your Face
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Arrest-Proof Yourself: An Ex-Cop Reveals How Easy It Is for Anyone to Get Arrested, How Even a Single Arrest Could Ruin Your Life, and What to Do If the Police Get in Your Face ReviewI almost cannot believe this book was written by a cop. If Hunter S. Thompson were not dead before the publication date, I would swear this was ghost-written. When he advises the reader to consider SOILING his or her PANTS to avoid being taken into custody, I can't vouch for the quality of the advice, but I have to admire the author's balls. Other bits of advice are undoubtably real gems; when the author recommends to always ask the cop for a Notice to Appear in court (or "NOA" - this is to be attempted before resorting to the pant-pooping) he is dispensing uncommon practical wisdom. His discussion of racial profiling, and direct advice to young black and hispanic men, is jaw-droppingly frank. Not unlike Thucydides, the author says, in effect: "Let us have no talk of just and unjust."
The bulk of this book is not unlike the various "Know Your Rights" resources published by groups like the ACLU, but it is vastly better. Those other resources give sound advice in the form of "rules," but it is abstracted from 4th and 5th Amendment case law. The truth is that the justice system exists primarily in the cracks between the laws - in the form of police and prosecutorial discretion. The subjective aspects of an encounter with the police - namely police incentives and psychology - are at least as important to your outcome as the positive law is. Any student of the Supreme Court can tell you what to do in a police encounter (e.g. "shut up"), but without any understanding of why you are doing it, it may be VERY difficult advice to follow.
Following the old adage "know your enemy in order to defeat him," the author shows you what a police encounter looks like from the cop's perspective. Police, the author emphasizes, are NOT "just people" - they are "Great White sharks" (his words) trained to churn as many arrests and seizures as possible. But -like sharks- they share certain natural tendencies that make them predictable, (to a limited extent) manipulable, and (above all) avoidable.
Another way it differs from the ACLU brand of rights books and videos is in its urgency. The author argues that, in the electronic panopticon that is today's justice system, an arrest is effectively as damning as a conviction. Computer databases mean that today, not just your penal interests, but also your future employment and your credit can be ruined by an arrest. This is why you - the citizen - must read this book. Not even the best attorney can get you "un-arrested" - you must help yourself by staying free in the first place.
That said, I think the author overstates this point a bit. The class of the offense and your age at the time still matter a great deal. Not even the CIA can afford to exclude everyone with a blemish on their record. Moreover, the panopticon is not really all that efficient (yet). If your name is "Joe Smith," from "Los Angeles," your legibility to the system is still pretty minimal.
Carson limits his advice to those bits helpful to the "clueless" petty criminal - the people most likely to be arrested in a random police encounter. This book tells you only how to navigate what the law calls a "Terry" stop. He's not interested in helping dangerous and/or professional criminals - who are in any event much more likely to be arrested pursuant to a warrant of some sort. (If your house is going to be raided, get a book on prisons, because this won't be of much help.)
This brings us to the author's very interesting editorial thesis: namely, that economics keeps petty offenses criminal. On this account, simple possession of marijuana remains a criminal offense primarily because courts and cops need something to do while they are between rapists and murderers. Petty crime is the daily bread of the justice system. This is a very interesting hypothesis, and while it probably deserves a more scholarly treatment than it recieves here (any U of Chicago grad students in the room?), it seems to me intuitively correct. This beast must eat a steady diet of petty offenders so that it's still in shape when we really need it. But this obviously sucks for the petty offenders (who, when you think about it, are really doing a public service) and Carson is interested in teaching them how to avoid the beast's jaws.
Sadly, the few people who really need this book are unlikely to have the foresight to read it. But, if you are at risk of being arrested this book is for you. If you look weird, are a young male, belong to a racial minority group, travel on foot, drive after midnight, use illegal drugs, have a prior record, or have friends or family who do any of the above, this book is worth taking a look at. Also highly recommended for people who work in the CJ system (except cops, who know this stuff).Arrest-Proof Yourself: An Ex-Cop Reveals How Easy It Is for Anyone to Get Arrested, How Even a Single Arrest Could Ruin Your Life, and What to Do If the Police Get in Your Face OverviewThis essential "how not to" guide explains how to act and what to say in the presence of police to minimize the chances of being arrested and to avoid add-on charges-which can often lead to permanent disqualification from jobs, financing, and education. Citizens can learn how to avoid arrest both on the street and when pulled over in a vehicle and are alerted to basic tricks cops use to get people to incriminate themselves. Sprinkled with absurdity and humor, this urgent, eye-opening book is a guide to criminal justice for all Americans.

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Sourcebook of Magic: A Comprehensive Guide to NLP Change Patterns Review

Sourcebook of Magic: A Comprehensive Guide to NLP Change Patterns
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Sourcebook of Magic: A Comprehensive Guide to NLP Change Patterns ReviewThose of you who missed the 1st edition of this excellent book, there is now a second chance to pick up this modern classic.
The premise of the work is that many NLP books are available that contain, within extensive "padding", only a few patterns, some books just one or two. Hall achieves his goal of separating the wheat from the chaff admirably with all the objectivity of a Haynes car manual leaving this pragmatic work refreshingly academic yet accessible. Like a cookbook it is reference driven allowing the practitioner access to these powerful patterns without the contingency of having to wade into battle against the author's literary aspirations.
What are these patterns?
Most of these patterns are primarily action orientated, simple exercises to be run through step by step with regard to specific ends. The other few are, more fundamentally, explanations of NLP assumptions, such as the principle of well formed outcomes.
Hall begins by introducing the reader to an overview of NLP and levels-of-processing that is indispensable, as within the instructions to the patterns he falls back on a few technical concepts with out further explanation, such as "test and future pace".
Then we come the patterns themselves, organised roughly according to their level of processing, the book allows you to easily select a pattern for your goal. Included patterns are; collapsing anchors, resolving internal conflict, chaining states, becoming intentionally compelled, responding to criticism, healthy eating, spinning icons.....
The second edition adds to the first; some simplification of the procedures and a little more detail as to the cognitive / behavioural mechanisms used in the patterns, and a deserved revision of the introduction. In the first (and second) edition Hall asserts that there may be as many as 200 distinct patterns and surely some that haven't been invented (or should that be discovered?) yet. So I was expecting some new patterns in the 2nd ed. but it's the original 77.
I don't know how I would start to define the distinction of a unique pattern (as opposed to a variant) anyway. I find it unlikely that at a computational - cognitive level there are 200 modes of action, so it's safe to assume the all of the building blocks are here for you. Hall hints that, a list of patterns touted as "exhaustive", would promote dogma and stagnate inventive development, through his legitimate assertion that all the patterns are largely prototypical and are easily extended and adapted.
Without being overly complex, this book is dense.Sourcebook of Magic: A Comprehensive Guide to NLP Change Patterns OverviewThis edition streamlines the patterns so that they are even more succinct and offers new insights about how the patterns work, that is, the cognitive-behavioral mechanisms that make the neuro-linguistic and neuro-semantic approach so powerful.

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The Frugal Woodturner: Make and Modify All the Tools and Equipment You Need Review

The Frugal Woodturner: Make and Modify All the Tools and Equipment You Need
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The Frugal Woodturner: Make and Modify All the Tools and Equipment You Need ReviewIn The Frugal Woodturner, author Ernie Conover goes over some basic information on tool selection and making your own tools and various mounts and holders. Lots of very good photos and illustrations are included to help you along as well.
It shows lots of traditional and perfectly good (and cheap) options for holding wood on the lathe that won't break the budget like many of the fancy new chucks, tools and gizmos in the stores these days can.
There are some areas where I wished he'd dove into a little more detail but, after all, we're being frugal in this endeavor. Right?The Frugal Woodturner: Make and Modify All the Tools and Equipment You Need OverviewThis comprehensive guide covers all the elements needed for setting up and maintaining a personal woodturning shop without breaking your budget. Providing the necessary knowledge for setting-up a woodturning shop at three different budget levels, this manual informs on how to choose the right lathe, find inexpensive wood, how to buy or make good tools and accessories, and setting up shop. This book gives woodturners options to enjoy the craft and do so affordably.

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The Big Book of NLP, Expanded: 350+ Techniques, Patterns & Strategies of Neuro Linguistic Programming Review

The Big Book of NLP, Expanded: 350+ Techniques, Patterns and Strategies of Neuro Linguistic Programming
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The Big Book of NLP, Expanded: 350+ Techniques, Patterns & Strategies of Neuro Linguistic Programming ReviewI used the ideas and techniques in this book for the last six months and got a lot out of it...
First and most important - it's down to earth. It's easy to read and understand, no jargon and no space fillers.
I use NLP for my own personal development goals, and occasionally to help out a friend in need. You can imagine, having this "cookbook" of self-help techniques is very helpful.
I am not interested in starting a practice as a practitioner of NLP or a corporate trainer, so I see no good reason in paying 6,500 euro for those weekend training programs.
I only want to "fine tune" myself, to forget a few bad habits and to learn a few new skills faster. In improving myself, I take Tony Robbins' advice:
"We all know that if we flip the switch, the light will go on or off. We don't need to know how the electricity supplies power and how the bulb converts that power into light. Most of us just need to know that it'll work. Don't waste time trying to understand everything, life's too short."
I just wanted to switch on the lights! This book helps me do that, again and again. I do not spend time on theories, I just try out ideas and enjoy the results.
NLP is not complicated, and if you're interested in trying it out and even change a habit or two - go for the techniques, follow the step by step instructions, and you'll get results.
The hardest part of reading NLP books is choosing the right one. I needed a simple practical reference to "everything NLP", and this is simply the best one out there. I recommend.The Big Book of NLP, Expanded: 350+ Techniques, Patterns & Strategies of Neuro Linguistic Programming Overview"A short NLP seminar will cost you at least $4,500. In this book you invest less than $0.25 per NLP technique, that can literally change your life. That's a bargain!" --Thomas Landmark, Revolucni NLP

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Reframing: Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the Transformation of Meaning Review

Reframing: Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the Transformation of Meaning
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Reframing: Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the Transformation of Meaning ReviewReframing is the art of shifting meaning. Bandler and Grinder put their attention on using communication, verbal and non-verbal, to shift meaning in their client's models of the world. An emphasis is on using language and language patterns. In this regard they succeed admirably. However, where I think they go off track is in their descriptions of "parts" and what they call 6-step reframing, even one of the authors - Richard Bandler says he doesn't do this anymore. I agree and add that it introduces fractionation and fragmentation in clients which isn't useful or suggested. This has bred a continuing controversy in the NLP(tm) community of professionals. Some still use the "parts" model and some are beginning to move away from it in favor of more integral and wholistic methods. There are other books that do a better job of presenting reframing and utilzation of language patterns, but with this caveat in place I recommend the book to anyone seeking to deepen and widen their knowledge of the NLP(tm) model. If you want to go further in understanding where the model has gone since the authors wrote this book try some of the later books, especially "Time for a Change" by Richard Bandler and "Persuasion Engineering" by Richard Bandler with John LaValle. Both of these present the new forms of hypnotic language usage quite well within a more integrated model.Reframing: Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the Transformation of Meaning Overview

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Frogs into Princes : Neuro Linguistic Programming Review

Frogs into Princes : Neuro Linguistic Programming
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Frogs into Princes : Neuro Linguistic Programming ReviewFor what it is this book is a 10, and it's a hoot to read as well! Even though it's now over 20 years old this is the first (and best-IMHO) book introducing the still cutting edge technology of human communication and cognition - Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP™). As far fetched a claim as it may seem, this is surely a seminal book in the field of human communication, linguistics, perception, cognition and psychology. The impact of NLP™ is present in all of these fields, often with more than a little kicking and yelling. After reading the book you're sure to understand why - Bandler and Grinder hold very little about traditional approaches and academic thinking as sacred. Although it's actually about a shift in the paradigm of how change can and does occur, it sometimes reads more like an exploration into the world of Svengali like magic and illusion. The material is presented in the form of a transcript of a live training superbly edited by Steve Andreas. The book is an example of 'doing' NLP™ as opposed to 'describing' it. It puts you in the training as Richard and John present it. As the editor of the book states in the forward, keep your mind open as you read because the authors are more often then not doing what they're describing. You'll want to read it with your eyes open - sometimes more easily said then done, since what the authors are doing is often presented in hypnotically engaging language. I've talked to more than one person who kept finding themselves waking up a few hours after having read through a few pages in this book. It is best to read this book as you would a novel, continuing through to the end, rather than trying to figure out or understand an individual section before moving on. The material is written is such a way as to resolve itself as you read. This is an example of "nested loops" a teaching technique Bandler and Grinder use extensively. However you get through it, in the end you'll find your thinking about thinking changed, and the journey as well worthwhile as the destination. As they say themselves, this book has nothing to do with theory or even the truth about things - instead it's "all about what works." --This text refers to the Paperback edition.Frogs into Princes : Neuro Linguistic Programming Overview

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